I start my little missive with greetings from my sun-kissed front door to all my friends. Another blue sky day down here at Rumpy Pumpy last Sunday, in fact such a sunshine day its far too hot for me. I need my coat trimming, but this lockdown thing means I can’t go to see my friend Kim who makes sure I always look my best. I confess to looking a bit scruffy at the moment, but worse is I am over-heating in the sunshine. Him Indoors is useless, you’d think he would at least have a go at trimming me but no, he tells me its best to wait until he can take me to Kim’s. I’m not so sure.
Catching up on TV series, or binge-watching on Netflix or Prime, is rapidly losing its attraction to us both. This week however we have loved “After Life” on Netflix. In truth, let me whisper, it’s a bit close to home for The Boss. I’ve glimpsed the odd tear. When we shared the odd biscuit or two, he told me that the main character was as near to how he was after Chris died as anything he’s ever seen. What fascinated him was how the writer “knew” how he felt. Told me it was a little bit scary. Actually, I reckon he’s a bit miffed his Chris didn’t leave him video messages like in programme, but I suggested that and he really wasn’t very impressed with my thoughts.
The best comedy programme on TV at the moment are the press conferences of the so-called leader of the free world. I was lay behind Him Indoors on the settee when I heard the lying toad say about injecting disinfectant. I fell off the settee! I’ll try and eat most things but even I know bleach just isn’t good on my chips.
Since I started writing, I must report the weather has now taken a turn for the worse. We’ve been stuck indoors for three days during which Him Indoors has had a bit of trouble. When he sat at the computer to do some work, his glasses fell off the table, he moved his foot to find them, stood on them and broke them! I learned quite a lot of new swearwords. Fortunately for us he still has reading glasses which means he can help me write this load of old rubbish, but he is in desperate trouble with watching tv and driving, together with life in general. He’s not been happy, I can tell you. Proper grumpy.
He tried sticking them together with super-glue (total failure), then glue with Sellotape (even bigger failure), then his neighbour Malcolm had a go (black tape failure) so we were at the point of balancing two halves on his nose to watch Scandi-noir with its subtitles! But Malcolm then saved the day by drilling the frames and fitting a piece of wire to hold them together. It all looks a bit Heath Robinson and odd. The Boss surely isn’t happy, but he can at least read his subtitles.
Really sad day yesterday when our lovely friend Roy Williams took his sound desk for the stars up to heaven. I suspect by now he will be working with John Prine, putting together a band and be organising the sound-check up there in the great hereafter. Him Indoors has been very upset, deeply moved as well by the tributes pouring out for Roy. I can tell you, Roy was the gentlest, kindest bloke this dog has ever encountered. It is interesting that these characteristics were also inspiring to the Old Boy as he has pressed on with Music in Hall and Festival. We’ll miss him coming to Rumpy Pumpy and entertaining us with his stories of life on the road (often with the stars).
This whole Covid thing is proving to be a bit of a pain in the backside. Is it me or is it going on for rather a long time? Him Indoors has remained remarkably calm throughout, which is not his normal state. I know he shouts at the tv at various points but he’s not nearly as bad as I expected.
His particular points of angst seems to be the lack of protective clothing for doctors, nurses, care workers. He always reminds the tv that there was warning about a pandemic but nobody anywhere seems to have done anything in preparation.
I had a bit of trouble the other day when I had a spell when my back-legs wouldn’t get me up the stairs. They are losing their spring – no cracks please about a non-springing springer – but Him Indoors became really upset. After I’d made a couple of efforts, he shoved my bottom and up I went. Once I had started I was ok, but if that was a sample of the effects of old age I am not impressed at all.
Being a bit of an anti-social chap in my old age, the one benefit of our lockdown seems to be that nobody else goes out walking along the river when we do. We’ve barely seen another dog this week, which suits me as I get to explore the whole bank uninterrupted.
Our friends are all being super helpful to Him Indoors. On Sunday we had Adrian & Andrea call to bring him a home-cooked meal and pudding; then up turned John & Sarah with beer! When the weather is nice Rumpy Pumpy has benches and chairs we can sit on at a safe distance and put the world right! It was a lovely day, even if technically supplies weren’t essential!!!!
Talking essential, The Boss (alternatively known as My Social Alcoholic friend) seemed happier when his white wine turned up this week. The wine rack has been looking decidedly thin since lockdown but the old boozer has now had a couple of deliveries to top things up to normality.
He’s having a bit of trouble with on-line groceries but he seems to have resolved the issue by ordering for a family of six when he does manage to get a slot. He continues to walk past his exercise bike on a regular basis without understanding he has to actually get on it and turn the pedals to achieve exercise.
Stay safe everybody, keep washing those hands and hopefully the worst will be over in a month or so.
God bless
Woof! Woof!
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