Beyond Here Lies Nothin’

Down every street there’s a window and every window made of glass

We’ll keep on lovin’ pretty baby for as long as love will last

Beyond here lies nothin’ but the mountains of the past

Happy Christmas!  I wish you the best of all things at this festive time. I have little doubt that The Boss and Mr Bridges will stuff themselves with food over this holiday time. Mr B isn’t visiting Rumpy Pumpy Court every day but Him Indoors has invited him whenever he wants to visit over the week.

I watched the groceries being delivered from Ocado, and saw the amount of fresh meat arriving from his favourite meat websites, so I can tell you that starvation is not on these fellows agenda.

It is an exciting time for the Christmas Grinch (ie Him Indoors) because at long last he has found a replacement for me. As I think I’ve told you he’s applied unsuccessfully for several rescue dogs but in the last couple of weeks those lovely people at North West Springer Rescue contacted him after he saw a plea requesting somebody to give a home to an 11 year old named Baxter.

Now readers, you must all agree this is such a cool name. I can report that Baxter was collected on 21^st December and has settled into Rumpy Pumpy like he owns it (certain similarity to myself, if I may say). I think Baxter will be perfect for His Lordship. He’s calm, loving and well behaved. He’s certainly a little unfit and over-weight (he makes me look quite a slim springer!!!) and The Boss has put him straight on a diet. Personally I think he is entitled to enjoy my previous lifestyle of free range chicken, dexter beef, pink cooked duck and an abundance of fresh fish but it appears he’s only allowed the fish at present!!!

Him Indoors is, of course, now being forced out and to walk. He’s been VERY retarded in this matter since I left him. I’ve tried to prick his conscience when he is reclined on my settee but to no avail. He always tells folks “my knees are bad” conveniently ignoring the fact that apparently the best thing he can do for his poorly knees is to use them! 

Therefore the arrival of an apparently unfit and overweight Baxter should – and I purposely use the verb “should” as opposed to “will” – make him get up off his **** and get strolling. I can report that in the first few days this has definitely occurred.

I realise that the last time I sent a missive down from the Rainbow Bridge I sort-of promised Him Indoors was giving up politics as a subject. I suspect you know what’s coming next.

In view of all the recent stories emanating from Downing Street he asked for special permission from me up here to express some thoughts, which I generously allowed in a moment of festive goodwill.

I confess to all you good people that I’m not sure it was the wisest decision I’ve ever made. To describe The Boss as “unhappy” would be the mildest of descriptions. “Incandescent with rage” probably describes his mood more correctly.

As the news kept leaking out about yet another “gathering” somewhere in government, Him Indoors (supposed to be taking it easy after his brush with covid) became increasingly agitated and belligerent towards the country’s supposed leader.

To put this all into perspective, The Boss doesn’t think the “gatherings” in themselves are the real story. It his opinion that the “business meetings” are simply the obvious expression by Johnson & the Tory party he has created (I give you as an example Rees-Mogg, a human being so distant from humanity he could be a dalek) of the total contempt with which they view us plebs. Talk about “do as I say, not as I do”….jeez. Meanwhile all their mates in business are given contracts without ever having to competitively tender, subsequently getting richer and richer. To say nothing of how we sold our Afghan friends down the river to be butchered by the Taliban (he innocently asks if we were selling arms over there in exchange for the heroin the Taliban supply over here?)

Where are all the decent, socially aware Tory MP’s? Do they still exist?

20LEGEND has been sacked by football’s most incompetent board to be replaced by a German coach who has won……..ooh nothing!! Just what United needed. He comes with a big reputation – don’t they all? – but a shite silverware record. I wish him luck dealing with this bunch. I’m not sure anybody exists who can turn this United around. CR7 – the ultimate and total football professional –  must be appalled at what he’s joined and be trying to get out again very quickly.

Herr Rangnick worked for Red Bull Group, a very professional organisation. Now he’s working for some incompetent American cowboys. I suspect he may see through their lies quite quickly and be gone, several million quid better off.

I’m taking great interest in the latest Covid developments. Him Indoors seems convinced that at some point the majority of the population will start to turn on the ant-vaccination folks who, by all accounts, are taking a majority of the beds in hospital because they are the one’s being admitted with covid. He was having a discussion with some friends about whether non-vaccinated should be charged for the cost of any covid treatment in hospital. Interesting thoughts from very liberal minded people!

I should conclude by reporting that the building of The Bosses downstairs toilet and shower is progressing very well. The downside is that his hall and stairs are not only effin freezing with the absence of a wall (temporary boarded though it is !!!!!!) but filthy with brick dust. However, the lads on the job are great and trying to minimise the disruption.

So finally I close and wish you a Happy Christmas from up here at the Rainbow Bridge and, of course, from Baxter who will naturally be the main dog over future tomes. I’m delighted The Boss has finally found another companion.

Enjoy your Christmas and let’s all hope 2022 down there on earth is a better year that sees Covid disappear and freedom return.

God bless

Woof! Woof!