Oh, what did you see, my blue-eyed son?; Oh what did you see, my darling young one? I saw a new-born baby with wild wolves all around it, I saw a highway of diamonds with nobody on it, I saw a black branch with blood that kept drippin’, I saw a roomful of men with their hammers a-bleedin’, I saw a white ladder all covered with water, I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken, I saw guns and sharp swords in the hands of young children, And it’s a hard, and it’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard And it’s a hard rain’s gonna fall

Just occasionally it makes sense to own up to being a dog, a fine Springer Spaniel indeed, to suit my purpose rather than continuing my real belief that I am actually a member of the upper-class human being group. However, as this rather frightening current health scenario develops, I will be making no attempt to claim anything other than living a dog’s life because it appears dog’s don’t get the virus. A clever one, yes, one that shows a rather fine intellect even if I say it myself plus a view of life that far outweighs a standard dogs view. But I have spent a lot of time with Him Indoors watching programmes – proper programmes, not scary sensationalist programmes – and I have realised none of us have ever encountered anything like this.

After all, have you ever seen football matches disappear from view? What happened to the rugby home internationals? Where is the first Grand Prix of the season? Where on earth is golfs Players Championship to say nothing of the Masters? Any tennis anywhere on tv?

No, you see, neither have you!! No sport of television is an apocalypse. It may even signal the end of the world as we know it. Can you actually imagine a world with no football? Unbearable!!!

On top of this tragedy, it appears that Him Indoors has decided that we are, literally, staying indoors as much as possible!!! Rumpy Pumpy has been  “social distancing” since our arrival back home last week from a little jaunt to the West Country.

We glimpsed the Brewery with the always dangerous Mr Bridges on Saturday – the usual risk it turned out as the “we will only have one” turned into The Boss returning home after three and falling asleep for two hours! My time there was enlightened by the arrival of Alf – border collie extraordinaire – and his lovely Mistress Karen. What a delightful surprise, although I felt a bit worried for her when she volunteered to drive the aforementioned Mr Bridges back home in order that he could make his date later that evening. Mmmm best not ask about the date I thought!!!

We’ve caught up with a good few TV serials / programmes whilst condemned to our lonely solitary existence. We laughed a lot – but with a few emotional tears – at “Cold Feet”, found “The Passenger” really rather good, managed to make it to the end of “The Adulterer”, were riveted by “The Split” to the early hours in a great long binge watch that reduced me to a heavy sleep but him to a fever of enjoyment and many more besides.

It is apparent that we have no sport, as I commented earlier, and I seriously worry about The Bosses mental health not having his weekly fix of Spanish football from La Liga.To make it all worse, they have had to cancel the next few Music in the Hall gigs so there is no live music in his life. This tends to make him fractious so I will keep you all posted on his health and temper.

It quickly became apparent that certain Festival things had to be abandoned as well, much to his disgust. His great regret was having to postpone his Sponsors Reception, presumably because he is worried that these lovely people may back away in difficult times. He has confided in me that the programme for October has been completed and he reckons it will prove popular but is now fretting about when to announce and the level of ticket sales. when they do.

You would expect him – after all, you know him – that he has some views about this whole Corona virus episode. When it first appeared in the news he laughingly told me that “Corona was the pop I used to drink as a boy”. I think he thought this was the same, but now we know different. Once he studied it, he realised it was pretty serious stuff and announced to me as we walked by the river that we were “social distancing” and I’d better get used to having just himself about with no visits to pubs or anywhere else.  He tells me that what scares him is that “nobody knows what to do” and “the world economy is going to go bust’.  We’ll see!

It has since dawned on me – a mere dog – that perhaps I could become His Masters mouthpiece over the next few weeks – or is it going to be months! The Boss told me that not being able to see/meet/talk with all his wonderful friends – spread far and wide – would border on being impossible to survive. Now, dear reader, you must accept that even in my elder years my main responsibility is to look after the old boy.

Therefore, to all our many lovely friends, even if you haven’t elected to follow my “Views from the Pavement” I thought I would send you them anyway with the love of Him Indoors and his wish that you stay safe and well through this particular nightmare.

Woof! Woof!