Not here it seems! No fall planned! The Boss has been all up and at ‘em since last Friday when his blessed Bewdley Festival started. Spare me, he’s been that active I haven’t had a look in. Even worse, he has been leaving me alone a lot of time. You see, let me explain. Our deal is – on which I agreed to come and live with him five years ago – (you must understand it was my decision, absolutely not his) that he pretty much spent ALL his time with me. Like, 24 hours a day all the time. Not 10 hours, then leave me alone to fret. Or all morning but no afternoons. Or vice versa. 24 hours. 24 hours. 24 hours.
I really don’t want to sleep that much with him not here. I get bored. I NEED to chase a ball. NEED. Not “would like to”. NEED.
Anyway, this Festival seems to mean that he leaves me for a short period every afternoon – jeez, that’s bad enough, I’m bored after ten minutes with nobody to talk to. Listen, when he talks he might not make a lot of sense, but he is absolutely miles better than the radio which for some reason he thinks I like and always leaves on for me when he goes out.
Why not the tv? That at least has pictures, and some of the news channels would keep me a bit interested. I haven’t quite mastered changing channels yet but I am very close. I would watch Daily Politics but maybe I would shout at it like he does, especially when his favourite interviewer Andrew Neil doesn’t get his questions answered.
In addition to leaving me every evening, he tortures me in the afternoon. Not literally torture, like putting a lighted candle on my tail but by cooking every single day his beloved Festival Sausages. Apparently these are a new creation, made by my pal Mick at the local butchers with local beer Worcestershire Sway. He cooks them, let’s them cool, wraps them up in foil and then takes them away with him in the evening. Not a little bit for me! Not a slice! Not a sniff! Absolutely nothing. I am lay on kitchen floor drooling but no effect, he simply refuses to give me any. This week it seems he has turned into a monster and I have become just a nuisance!
Mind you, he returns home and has been normally in a pretty good mood. The events are well attended, whilst he looks after the important Sponsor Partners in some posh upstairs room and then escorts them to the Balcony Gallery. It seems to me that what that actually means is he talks a lot plus he’s allowed a drink or two if he wanted (but as he is driving, it appears his social alcoholism doesn’t come into play). He tells me it is far more important than doing just that, because without the sponsors it becomes really hard work to create a Festival that is so good. I leave it to you, my fans, to decide if he’s correct or not!
On the big plus side, The Boss is sorting out his entertainment calendar up to Christmas. This should mean plenty of left-overs for a half-starved springer spaniel! He told me tonight that several of my favourite people are coming to eat dinner. Yippee!!
Christmas! That’s a subject on its own. At this point in time, it normally means lots of letter writing in Christmas cards, but also plenty of new music when his favourite artists release their latest efforts. Talking of which, Tom Petty is still being played lots whilst he continues to keep trying to make me dance to it. Tom’s music is stunningly good stuff though.
So I am pleased to report, although his Festival isn’t over quite yet, it does appear there is not going to be a fall anywhere.
Woof! Woof!
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